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Tuesday, December 18, 2012

They are keeping me on my toes!

I have been pulling more random plausible yet wholly fabricated answers out of my butt this year than ever before.

I think it's because Drama is getting closer to the Age of Disbelief.  He's questioning Santa.  The Elves that bring good boys Advent treats.  The reason why some kids get all their gifts from Santa, but these guys only get one.  Why his friend down the street gets to have Christmas when she doesn't believe in Jesus, God or even Santa.  And on and on it goes.

Here are some of my more recent gems:

1.  As always, the Mall Santa WORKS for the big guy.  He reports back every night on the kids he's seen, and updates the wish lists and the naughty/nice list.  How?  Santa has an I-pad and WiFi.  He got it for Christmas last year.

2.  Why didn't the elves bring stuff last night?  Daddy called them and said you left your wrappers shoved between the couch cushions, but they already knew.  He just asked them not to leave coal dust - you know how he is about the carpet!

3.  Every kid gets ONE toy from Santa, no matter how many under the tree say they are from Santa.  When parents have their first baby, they have to decide if they will make all the gifts from Santa, or tell the truth, that some are from mommy & daddy.  We chose to let you know that we give you gifts, and that we are giving the gifts in celebration of Jesus' birthday.  Jesus only got 3 gifts, so you should feel blessed to get more than that!

4.  Your friend down the street?  She doesn't get a gift from Santa.  He doesn't even stop at her house because she doesn't believe in him.  And as far as celebrating Christmas?  Well, anyone can have a holiday with presents.  Not everyone can celebrate the birthday of the guy who died to save them from sin.  We know the real reason for Christmas, and why we celebrate.  The rest is just like the bow on a present, or the icing on the cake - extra fancy, but extra fun too!

5.  Little Johnny has a Elf that moves around his house and watches him all day?  WOW!  He must be extra bad and need more reports back to Santa.  You should be proud that your behaviour has not yet caused Santa to send a constant Elf-watcher!  Actually, for you guys, he'd probably send the Elf SWAT team...

I'm sure I'm missing a few gems of mine, but it seems like every day there's another question.  Drama has asked me straight out if I'm the elf in the Advent calendar.  Of course, I lied to his face, because I want to hold on to his belief just a little bit longer.  Let them be kids, I say!  And keep turning to me for all the answers.  Because I know it's going to end much sooner than I'm ready for.

1 comment:

  1. Just started reading a few if your posts. You totally crack me up!


Gimme some love and tell me what you think! No really, I can take it. I'll just double-up on those anti-depressants first.

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