Waking the animals is always an interesting proposition at our house. One never knows if they'll be greeting by a giggle and smile, or thrashing and gnashing of teeth. However. Most do not expect to start their day with a gas mask.
Me: Stanky, wake up! (tickle, tickle, pull sheets off)
Stanky: Hmfph umph ugh (rolls over & sticks butt in air - I should have abandoned ship)
Me: (smacks butt-in-air) Time to wakey wakey! (still patting bootie) C'mon dude, time to get dressed and - wait, did you just fart into my hand?
Stanky: (grunts & groans, then flops over to end of bed, impressively breaks wind - we're talking like, college-boy beer-farts here people)
Stanky: (laughs like maniac) Maybe you should just tape my butt shut instead of wakin' me up huh mom?
Grumpasaur chooses that moment to tune in, gaping incredulously at middle child.
Me: Whaaaaat? Seriously Stanky?
Grumpasaur: Did he really just say that?
Stanky: My job's done. Can you turn my show on?
Fun times. Fun times.